Finding Gold in Broken Places: When Help Comes in Human Form

There's this beautiful Japanese art called kintsugi, where they repair broken pottery with gold, making it more valuable than before it was broken. During my darkest days—when a tumor was crushing my chest, threatening my unborn child and vital organs—I discovered our version of this art.

Only our gold came in human form.

The Death of the Dream

People often land in my therapy office when they hit that rough patch where life isn't what they hoped it would be. I call this the "Death of the Dream" moment. It's when you realize a lot of what you dreamed about for yourself hasn't happened, and instead, life's thrown you some pretty wicked curve balls.

For me, it was multiple organ failures that led to me being sent home to consider hospice. Years into this ordeal, open-heart surgery revealed even more damage. As one cardiologist told me, "You have a broken heart, and we had to break it even more to fix it. But when we got in there, we discovered it wasn't the only thing broken." (Eek! Talk about a metaphor coming to life.)

But here's where the gold started appearing:

• A life group from church showing up with $1,500 wrapped in a napkin

• A pastor handing us the night's offering with a puzzled "I don't know why, but this is for you"

• An insurance case manager stepping between me and aggressive collectors like a warrior angel in business casual

• Friends bringing meals, cleaning our house, watching our kids while we gasped for air

• Family truly acting like family: moving in, driving to appointments, managing our homeschooled kids, and praying us through our darkest hours

Practical Tools For Finding Your Gold

Maybe your story looks different. Maybe it's a marriage ending when you thought it was forever, a diagnosis that changed everything, a loss that left you questioning everything, a betrayal that shattered your trust.

Whatever broke you, I want you to know something: gold is coming. Sometimes it just shows up wearing scrubs or bringing casseroles.

Here are some practical tools for spotting your own gold:

1. The Daily Gold-Finder

• Morning: Name one person who's shown up for you

• Afternoon: Notice one unexpected helper

• Evening: Record one moment of grace

2. Your Gold Journal

Keep track of:

• Unexpected allies

• "Coincidental" timing

• Small mercies

• Moments of unexpected peace

3. The Broken-Beautiful Map

Draw your journey, marking:

• Where you broke

• Where gold appeared

• Who brought the gold

• What strength you found

4. Golden Permission Slips

Give yourself permission to:

• Not be "over it" yet

• Need help

• Find new dreams

• Start again

5. The Gold-Spotter's Guide

Look for help in unexpected places:

• The stranger who holds the door

• The nurse who stays late

• The friend who just listens

• The neighbor who shows up

6. Building Your Gold Collection

Start gathering:

• Names of helpers

• Moments of grace

• Small victories

• Unexpected gifts

Real Gold Stories

Let me tell you about Sue, one of our Epic Comeback participants. After being run over by her own car—talk about life taking unexpected turns—she joined our classes. Today, she's changing the world through her "Force for Good" foundation, funding programs for women's and children's mental and physical health. Next month, she's going to the United Nations as a delegate on behalf of her world-changing work. Rock on Susan!

This is what gold in broken places looks like. Not just healing, but becoming a force for healing others.

When the Dream Dies, Something New Is Born: The Epic Comeback Community

I was a mother of three in my early 30s, newly married, when my health crisis hit. Living in the wake of my heartbreak meant figuring out life as a young adult cancer survivor with a broken heart—literally and figuratively. My ordeal stole my innocence, fractured my body, mired my mind in trauma, and deeply injured my family.

But a new part of me was also born, filled with a fiery determination to survive and piece together a new life on an unfamiliar island called Survivorship. While grateful to be alive, I had no idea how to navigate this new landscape, filled with PTSD, marital problems, financial difficulties, body alterations, the death of earlier dreams, loss of dignity, constant uncertainty, new enemies, an altered worldview, deep-rooted fear, rapid aging, and hordes of "experts" who often fell short.

This is why we created Epic Comeback. Because while gold often comes in human form, sometimes we need help recognizing it. We offer:

• Gold-Finding Groups (online and in-person)

• Healing Circles

• Support Navigation

• Connection with others who get it

Because here's what I know for sure: the places where you feel most broken are exactly where the gold will shine through.

With hope and healing,

Cindy

P.S. If you're feeling completely broken right now, remember: in kintsugi, the gold can't do its work until there are cracks to fill. Your broken places are not the end of your story—they're the beginning of a more beautiful one.